by Charmaine Hudson
Life throws you for a loop when you least expect it.
My grandmother became dangerously ill in August of last year. She has always been the sassy, bible thumping; Jesus-is-my-all grandmother or “grand-poo” as my family calls her. She was a wonderful cook and made sure that her house was spotless at all times. I miss calling and talking to her.
My heart broke when I saw her laying in ICU breathing through a ventilator. I had traveled to Ohio to see her and it was hard to accept the fact that she couldn’t do the things that she wanted to do anymore. I couldn’t call her on the phone and laugh with her. I was no longer going to be able to help her cook and listen to her obscenities about our family. I realized that things happen for a reason, she’s eighty-six-years-old and I had to face reality.
Last month my dad had a heart attack. I didn’t know what to think when I found out he had heart disease and had to have a quadruple bypass. I didn’t want to accept the fact that he had to go through that procedure. I prayed that he would be miraculously healed and the doctors would send him home. To my dismay, that was not the case; he had no choice and had to have the surgery.
All the while, I found out my ninety-seven-year-old great-uncle had passed away. I felt as if my life was at a standstill. I didn’t know what was going on. My two thousand sixteen wasn’t supposed to begin this way!
I am a writer and no longer did I have the urge to write. I would go to work and visit my dad at the hospital during lunch and afterwards before going home. Every time I opened my journal I would pick up my pen and just sit there. I had so much on my mind I couldn’t write it out on paper.
Finally, I decided to just let it all go, to stop living in denial about my grandmother and my dad. My dad had the surgery and is doing very well, in fact, he’s recovered quickly and is walking and being his normal self again.
As for as my grandmother, she is fighting the good fight. She’s holding on strong but I know that one day it will come to an end. I try my best to always remember the times that I did spend with her.
When life throws you for a loop you have no choice but to keep moving on, sometimes getting ready for the next, but I know I have more years ahead of me and it’s up to me to live my life to the fullest no matter what.